Boys with Sisters

25.01.2015

Someone said something to me recently that made me laugh at first, but then I realised I actually agreed with him. He said – when I meet a guy for the first time, and I find out he has a sister, my first instinct is oh cool must be a good guy. At first it seems like a very generous first impression, but my brother is a very generous boy so this is only fitting. I laughed, but I was also honoured that he thought sisters shape a man’s character so greatly, and knowing that I would always be a big part of his life and he in mine. And when I thought about it some more, I realised I actually agreed with him.

First impressions are snap judgements, the things you realise about a person in the first 30 seconds you see them before they even open their mouth and speak. And once you get to know them a bit more, you have a general idea of if you would get a long or not but this could all change dramatically over the course of your lifetime and they may not even feature in the rest of your life’s path as their own goes off on another tangent. Yet that first impression will always remain.

And I think my brother may be on to something. People say that you can always judge a man by the way he treats his mother and waiters. While this is true, I don’t always meet a guy’s mother but when I meet a guy who has a close relationship with his siblings this is often the flipper for me. And even more so if he takes care of his sisters. Maybe this is because I value my relationship with my brother, so I look for people who also value their relationships with their siblings, or maybe it’s because it shows he is a caring and compassionate human regardless of my familial ties. Either way, I’m not sure why but there is something about a guy who looks out for his sisters and genuinely honestly cares about their wellbeing, that makes me cave.

If you grow up with a sister, you watch them turn from scruffy little tomboys and playmates to girls who doodle hearts in their books and become creatures with shrill voices that annoy you. And then you grow up a bit more and they change yet again to emotional thirteen year olds with violent mood swings who think the world hates them and suddenly they are blushing sixteen year olds coming home from school with a boy and then sobbing uncontrollably each time they get left behind. You see the ups and downs, the hours they spend getting ready for a date, the boys who break their hearts, the way they suddenly know instinctively how to hold a baby like it was something they were born to do, and you wonder how that tomboy became this woman. Knowing this, about a woman who you have grown up playing with and pulling her hair interchangeably, you realise the complexities of being a woman and the many facets of a woman’s character and feelings. And if I were to trust a boy with my heart, it would probably end up being a boy who has a sister.